f up jokes Audiobooks

Even in a lovely town like River Bluffs, Indiana, flipping houses can be a challenge. Especially when there’s the proverbial skeleton in the closet—and a literal corpse in the driveway . . . House-flipper Jazzi Zanders has her work cut out for her. Her latest flip, which she co-purchased with her fiancée Ansel and cousin Jerod, is a three-story fixer-upper that’s more of a droopy-downer. One corner of the house is sinking and needs to be jacked up with a new cement foundation. That costs money. And causes headaches. And creates a work environment that’s not only hostile, it’s downright deadly . . . Jazzi knows it’s a tough job. Which is why she hired Darby to lay the cement. But when Darby gets into a fiery argument with the furnace man—and then never shows up to lay gravel for the driveway—Jazzi starts to wonder if the rumors about Darby are true. Did he kill his wife and son and bury them in the yard like some folks claim? When Darby’s dead body comes pouring out of a gravel truck, murder upstages the real estate market as her biggest concern . . .

Living in the small town of Heavenly, Pennsylvania, Claire Weatherly has come to admire the Amish for their wholesome, honest way of life. But she also knows that nothing is as simple as it seems—especially when murder disturbs the peace. Claire has always been game for a good puzzle, so when she hears that Mose Fisher has made one of his famous corn mazes, she can’t wait to walk the paths and test her skill. But she’ll have a much more serious puzzle to solve when, deep inside the maze, she discovers the body of Amish dairy farmer Harley Zook. It won’t be easy for Detective Jakob Fisher to investigate a murder on his own father’s farm—not after being shunned by the man for leaving the Amish community and becoming a cop. With Mose himself as a suspect, and old family secrets cropping up, it’s up to Claire to help catch the killer before she finds herself at a dead end.

In addition to her house-flipping talents, Jazzi Zanders is breaking ground as a sleuth. But she’s going to need every tool at her disposal to solve two crimes . . . In their hair salon, Jazzi’s sister Olivia and mother are savvy businesswomen whose creativity brings fashion and flair to the folks of Rivers Bluff, Indiana. So when their newest hairstylist Misty is caught scamming clients’ debit cards and selling beauty products during off hours to pocket the profits, Olivia fires her. But Misty retaliates by hitting back with a defamation lawsuit—which she is more than happy to drop if Olivia pays her ten grand. But neither blackmail nor courtroom fees are accrued after Misty’s body is discovered in the salon with Olivia’s scissors stuck in her chest. Olivia may be the number one suspect, but her murdered employee had a reputation for making enemies. Then Jazzi’s ex Chad appears, asking for help with his marital strife. This already awkward situation worsens when Chad’s wife vanishes and the police investigate him. Now, it’s up to Jazzi to clear both her sister’s and ex’s names while the killer—or killers—could be a mere hair breadth’s away . . .

When you grow up in Home, WA, the road always leads you to… well, home. I’m Bartlett Rough, and I’ve never left the mountain where I was raised with my six brothers and sisters. Cheesy as it may sound, Home really is where the heart is. But we’re all growing up, building cabins of our own, taking claim of our land. Things are changing. I feel that more than ever, when the winter winds sweep Abby into town. This wild, fierce beauty is everything I’m not. I own the hardware store, know everyone in this town by name, and am expected to settle down with someone local. Abby tumbled into town on a train, with nothing to her name, clutching her dog Hijinx, and holding onto her memory of Home from when she came through here years ago. I’ve played it safe my whole damn life. After one night with Abby, I have someone to fight for. A reason to risk it all. But falling for her has no guarantees -- she could leave as fast as she came, taking my heart along with her. Coming Home to the Mountain is a new filthy-sweet, high heat series by Frankie Love featuring rugged mountain men who fall hard, fast and forever. And with the women they love at their side, they choose to put family first. In this series, Dad shows up. Sister’s remember to call, big brother’s always look out for you, and Mom knows to keep an extra seat at the table for Sunday dinner. Not every family is perfect -- and the Rough family has its own set of problems -- but at the end of the day, they know what matters: Coming Home.

Catch her if you can... The Renaldis, Book 2 Rafael Renaldi is a modern man with an old-fashioned secret-an arranged marriage. Though it was an informal agreement, made when they were children, Rafe has always been a little in love with the beautiful, passionate Catalina Campioni. And assumed that the single, searing kiss they shared years ago sealed the deal. Marriage? Babies? Not now-not yet. After growing up witnessing her mother's devastation over her father's cheating, Cat has no intention of settling down anytime soon. She plans to live life to the fullest before marching down the aisle-and it definitely won't be with womanizing, lethally charming Rafe. When Rafe realizes his bride-to-be wants nothing to do with him, he does what a crazed man might do-he kidnaps her. But not to force her to the altar. She wants adventure? He'll show her adventure, and show her life with him will never be dull. But even as they fall in love, someone close is desperate to keep them apart and will do whatever it takes to ensure they won't marry. Anyone. Ever... Warning: Put a sexy, charming Italian hero together with a fiery, beautiful Italian heroine and you have a combustible romance on your hands. Nothing like a good old-fashioned kidnapping and arranged marriage to help a couple fall in love.

" You are no one to me, you are nothing, and don't ever expect anything from me. You were bought here to play the part of a Luna and gratify my sexual desire," My Mate and new alpha said, with no remorse or any kind of affection in his gaze, tears well in my eyes but I refused to cry for the man who beds other women in my presence. I look him in the eyes and answer; " Yes," " No," He growls " Yes, Alpha," I repeat and he walks past me, once he's out of my sight, my legs give up just as tears roll down my cheeks. ... " You're pregnant, Luna, congratulations," My world stopped as I looked at the doctor, she was happy that the pack would have an heir, but I wasn't, you can't be when you've suffered so much at the hands of your fated mate. I ran, I ran and ran but it wasn't far enough for the mighty alpha.

In this international bestseller by the award-winning novelist Mariana Leky, a heartwarming story unfolds about a small town, a grandmother whose dreams foretell a coming death, and the young woman forever changed by these losses and her loving, endearingly oddball community On a beautiful spring day, a small village in Western Germany wakes up to an omen: Selma has dreamed of an okapi. Someone is about to die. Luisa, Selma’s ten-year-old granddaughter, looks on as the predictable characters of her small world begin acting strangely. Protesting that they are not superstitious, each of the villagers grapples with the buried secrets and deferred decisions that have suddenly become urgent in the face of death. Luisa’s mother struggles to decide whether to end her marriage. An old family friend, known only as the optician, tries to find the courage to tell Selma he loves her. Only Sad Marlies remains unchanged, still moping around her house and cooking terrible food. But when death finally comes, the circumstances are outside anyone’s expectations. Across three defining moments in her life, Luisa grapples with life's big questions alongside her devoted friends, young and old. A story about the absurdity of life and death, a bittersweet portrait of village life and the wider world that beckons beyond, it is also a thoughtful meditation on the way loss and love shape not just a person, but a community. Mariana Leky's What You Can See from Here is a charmer―a moving novel of grief, first love, reluctant love, late love, and finding one's place in the world, even if that place is right where you started.

On my 18th Birthday, My twin sister married my mate, Alpha Jacob, in my name. I was Alisa Clark, the she-wolf with the purest blood. The Alphas must feed on my blood. They were blessed with great power while they were cursed. The greater their abilities, the shorter their lives. My blood protected them from their curse Yet, my twin Jennifer took away my glory and had me tortured for 6 years! Worse still, My mate allowed it ** "You've been like a pig for us. He can smell you down here. He's known this whole time." She took out a mirror and held it up to my face. " You think he would ever accept such an ugly mate like this pig." I hadn't seen myself since I was twelve, vibrant and healthy. I was a child then, and now I looked like a ghost. My face was hollow and pale like a sick person. I saw the scar on my face, it burned and had inflamed my cheek so that it was swollen. My eyes were red from the tears. My hair was dull and limp over my skull. My purple eyes were the only piece of me that still held some semblance of life. I could see scars even on my neck, and I knew that my body was even more scarred, and even more pathetic... "How dare you be so stupid." Jennifer said. "How dare you think the Alpha wants you for more than your blood. Imagine him mating with you, when he could have me."

For three years, Heidi served Lucas with all her heart, showering him with endless love and doing her best to be the perfect housewife. But on their third wedding anniversary, he slammed the divorce papers on her face. "Did you think I would never know that you married me because of money? Whatever Grandpa paid you, I will triple it. Just sign the divorce." To him, she was just a gold digger. Heidi's reality shattered, and everything made sense when she found out that his Ex had returned. For him, she endured hardships and humiliation. She not only gave him her heart, but also dropped her identity as the wealthiest heiress in Phoenix City. Realizing that all her efforts were futile… She will never be the hopelessly desperate housewife anymore. Lucas is soon to know that he "Shouldn't Mess Up with His Hidden Heiress Ex-wife." As layers upon layers of secrets get revealed, he'll be crawling on his knees, holding her leg and begging her to come back. No way! She has an empire to inherit.

Summer fiction at its page-turning best for fans of Elin Hilderbrand, Holly Chamberlin, and Nancy Thayer! Colleen French, acclaimed author of The Summer I Found Myself , brings readers to Albany Beach, Delaware, where one woman must decide whether to seek out the daughter she gave up for adoption. Each year, the start of summer brings bustle and much-needed tourist dollars to the little town of Albany Beach, Delaware. For Natalie Sullivan, this season is proving more stressful than others. It’s make-or-break time for the Irish pub her husband, Conor, recently bought with his brothers. Their two children are thriving, but she’s experiencing pangs of loss at the end of her childbearing years. When sixteen-year-old McKenzie starts gushing about Bella, the new coworker at her summer job, Natalie suddenly finds her past and present in conflict. Bella, two years older than McKenzie, looks so similar that a customer remarks that they could be sisters. And when Natalie learns that Bella was adopted, she is propelled back into a heartbreaking decision. As a college student, Natalie became pregnant and put her baby up for adoption. Now, the more McKenzie talks about Bella, the more Natalie wonders: could Bella be her daughter? Conor insists it’s a mistake to pursue the matter. Natalie’s child belongs to another family now; that was the agreement in the closed adoption. Still, Natalie can’t resist spending time with Bella. As their bond deepens, McKenzie accuses her mother of caring more for a stranger than for her, and Natalie begins imagining what it would be like to have Bella as a second daughter. What will the impact be if Bella really is her biological child? And if she isn’t, can Natalie embrace the joy and potential in her own family, without always wondering about what could have been?